Volunteering can give you the gratification of taking action to further your values and will bring you into contact with others who share your interests and ideals. Identify a cause that is important to you and get involved commit some of your time to a community organization or a local place of faith. They should support your goals and efforts to achieve them, not belittle or undermine or ignore them. Remember, those in your support system should help you reduce stress, not increase it. Similarly, if they engage in unhealthy behaviors, such as alcohol or substance abuse, particularly if you have had trouble with such issues, they also may not be a good choice for your social support network. If you find that you are drained whenever you see a particular friend, or that he or she is inconsiderate of your time or feelings, or is unreliable, highly critical of you, or generally negative, they may not be the friend for you. Know when a relationship isn’t working for you.
Know your own and respect that of others, even it differs from yours.
Respect needs and limits. Each person has their own setting for how much social interaction they need and want. Whatever the case, accept apologies graciously (as you would hope others would accept yours). (Don’t stuff bruised feelings.) Your friend will likely appreciate the opportunity to remedy the situation. Start by assuming that it is a misunderstanding or that the misstep was unintentional, but ask them about it. If a friend does or says something that hurts your feelings, try to deal with it directly. Keep the lines of communication open. Open, honest communication is the lifeblood of healthy, happy relationships. If you find yourself feeling a little jealous too, you can acknowledge that to yourself, but don’t let it poison your friendship. Support successes. When you genuinely care about someone you will be excited when they succeed. Let them! Accepting help can help you. It also keeps the relationship balanced and lets your friends and loved ones know that they have something to offer that you value. But friends and family often want to feel they have done something for you. Some may fear becoming dependent or want to maintain their self-image as the “strong” and “together” one. Be a good listener and allow your friends to confide freely and without being judged.Īccept their help. Some people find it hard to accept support, preferring to be the one always offering it instead. Stay in touch through phone calls, texts, and emails reciprocate invitations.īe available when you’re needed. True friends come through when times are tough. Tell your friends and family how important they are to you and thank them for all they give you. Many factors contribute to healthy, happy relationships. In other words, be the friend you want to have. A good rule of thumb is to treat your friends as you want to be treated. Successful relationships require give-and-take. In doing all this they provide encouragement and lower your stress and feelings of loneliness. They can help you think through alternatives and solve problems, and they can distract from your worries when that is what’s really needed. Friends and loved ones will listen to your fears, hopes, and dreams, and make you feel seen and understood. Supportive relationships can also bolster you emotionally when you’re feeling down or overwhelmed.This feature of social support can be comforting and enhance your feelings of security. There are many practical benefits to having supportive relationships, such as knowing people who can provide you with information, advice, guidance, and also tangible support, such as assistance in times of uncertainty.(See Identifying Your Breathe Supports for more information.) In addition to buffering stress, some friends can even help you identify when you are stressed or distressed - in some cases they may notice it before you do.Friends and loved ones can make you more resilient in times of stress, setback, or loss and they can also make the good times even better. Research has shown that there are tremendous benefits in having a network of supportive relationships: those with robust social support networks have better health, longer lives, and report higher well-being.
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